absence of thought

ever realized that you have so many things to say or that you want to write down, and you tell yourself to put a page mark on it in your brain, but the second you get the chance, it's all gone?
just happened.
i sometimes wish that i was insightful...that the occasional new thought that enters my brain will stay and grow into something that i can share, but this seems out of my reach.
i think in run-on sentences that most of the time wouldn't make sense to any rationally thinking human being. i am sorry if this blog turns out to be a direct interpretation of my jumbled thoughts.

here is a quick summary of what is going on with me right now:
i am in california visiting my grandparents at the moment. they live in burbank, not far removed from the hustle and bustle of downtown l.a. my grandmother's birthday was yesterday, and i was supposed to arrive at the burbank airport at around 2:20 california time. i, however, in my still drunken stooper left over from the new years celebrations the night before, woke up and realized that i was not done packing yet and should have left for the airport about 20 minutes earlier, and seemed to miss my flight. as we rushed to the airport it was made clear to me by a friend that i would probably make it onto the plane, but my baggage would not. i thought nothing of it...at least i still had time to make my flight.
that was until we missed the exit off of the highway, cutting an extra 15 minutes off of the time that i had to run to the gate where i was supposed to board the plane. the scene of kevin's family in home alone running through the airport trying to make their flight to paris kept playing in my head as we sped for the airport after looping back around and taking the correct exit.
needless to say, i missed my flight. on my grandmother's birthday. still drunk. and wishing desperatly that i could make myself throw up just to make the hangover more bearable.

6 hours later, i was on the flight to burbank. 2 crying babies and 3 more hours after that, my grandmother, my step-grandfather, and their two dogs picked me up in their prius.

i made an early night of it by california time, and woke up to my father calling to make sure that i was still alive. after breakfast at 11 (yes we had breakfast at 11), i went with my grandmother to costco. JUST A FRIENDLY WARNING: if you ever have a chance to go to a costco ANYWHERE near l.a., refuse it immediately. in being there for 30 minutes, i was nearly run over by 2 little old ladies with oversized shopping carts, and one little asian man with an equally unnecessarily large sized shopping cart. trying to chase my grandma around the warehouse sized store with a huge cart of my very own was impossible. i finally planted myself firmly next to the gallons of lobster bisque and the sample lady with orange juice and waited for my gram to make her selections and bring them to the cart. it seemed much safer. this whole ordeal wasnt over without a 20 minute wait in a line 10 people deep to check out. walking past the "cafe" was a site as well. i was reminded of the texas state fair, and the line for deep fried jelly beans, and deep fried bacon.

the rest of my day was far less stressful.
a quick visit to the worlds rarest diamond (which is much smaller than i thought it would be) at the museum of natural history, and a 30 minute walk through the la brea tar pits and the museum on the grounds were followed by a great dinner at the village idiot on melrose, a restraunt co-owned by two of my dads oldest friends and business partners.

seeing as this is my first trip to visit my grandparents by myself, i am finding it hard to connect and have any deep and meaningful conversations with them. i always have to censor myself around them. there is so much that they dont know about me. i have to cover my tattoos so that i will not be scorned by my thoroughly jewish relatives. anyone have any conversational topics to suggest for me?


we shall see what tomorrow brings.